WANT!

KA-ME!!! HA-ME!!! HA!!!!! *ca-ching*

I Got Your Mystic Quest Right Here...

Painfully true and pretty hilarious, check this flowchart of any RPG.

Seems pretty timely considering that the craptastic "American" Final Fantasy: Mystic Quest became available this week for download on Nintendo's Virtual Console.

In the Jungle, the Mighty Jungle...

At today's Mac event, Commandant Jobs unveiled some fairly lackluster updates.

Something about iPhoto. I don't really care since I happily use picasa and flickr. And if I were to pay for something to edit my photos, I would save up until I could afford to get Aperture.

Something about Garage Band, which, again, is boring as I don't play music. I don't even play Rock Band for that matter.

But there were a couple of hopeful glimmers.

Jobs dropped the bomb that they were working on their next OS system: Lion. The biggest advances seem to be aimed at bringing the functionality of an iPad back to the Mac. this means they want to be able to run full-screen apps and have multi-touch control for the macs. If they can incorporate this multitouch into the next generation of Macbook Pros with the Liquidmetal design, the proposed cooling patents and somehow keep the machine from becoming sentient and trying to destroy mankind, it should be a pretty solid machine. But it kind of seems that Jobs has painted himself into a corner with the name of the system. Lion? The king of the jungle? What will they call the next OS afterwards? Sabretooth? Tabby? Or will there be a shift to a new animal-avatar? "Presenting Mac OSX...Koala."

Steve also managed to sneak in his characteristic "Once last thing..." before closing out the hour-and-a-half long schpiel. A newly redesigned Macbook Air. What really caught my attention about these updated models was the complete abandonment of a hard-drive. As of late I have been warming up to Solid-state Drives as the future of storage on computers. They're faster, quieter, cooler, smaller and less prone to mechanical problems than regular disc-based hard-drives. The new Airs instead use flash memory as storage. Consequently they are only able to hold between 64 Gb and 256GB. In a world where Terrabyte storage is becoming more common place and the Petabyte is looming ever closer, this amount of storage is paltry at best. And also, it might just be my own personal experience with the program Flash, but the name itself brings to mind negative connotations. Time will tell if this system will be preferred over regular hardware found in the grown-up version of laptops, or if this was merely the bastard son of a drunken tryst between a Macbook and an iPad.

Overall, it was another bland entry of a Mac Event. I guess I'm just jaded against anything that isn't a mind-blowing hardware revelation. Guess I'll just have to wait until the next generation of workhorse.

I would watch it...

See more funny videos and funny pictures at CollegeHumor.

3DS 3Destroys All!

Sweet, merciful Poseidon, this is a good one. Earlier this week Nintendo announced the final specs, library and features of their next generation handheld system: the Nintendo 3DS. While there had been a decent amount of information that had been released during it's initial unveiling at E3 (as well as some launch titles), Wednesday's news revealed cold, hard facts about it's latest and most glorious handheld.

First off, the 3DS (as the name implies) is 3D. Full-on, stereoscopic 3D, but WITHOUT GLASSES. Suck it, Sony. The 3.53-inch screen provides autostereoscopic 3D with a sliding dial on the side to determine how much depth of field you want or to turn off the 3D completely.

The hardware for this device is pretty great too...for Nintendo. The (boring) facts of this handheld. 3DS sports:

CPU: 2 x 266MHz ARM11

GPU: PICA200 133MHz GPU by DMP

RAM: 64MB

Storage: 1.5GB Flash-based plus available SD card expansion.

Blah, blue, snore. Right? But here's the thing. Below are the specs for Nintendo's last home console: the Gamecube.

CPU: 486 MHz IBM "Gekko" PowerPC CPU

GPU: 62 MHz "Flipper" LSI GPU

RAM: 43 MB total non-unified RAM

Storage: None. All storage is on removable (and easily corrupted) memory cards.

I'm not a scientist or anything, but it seems tome that the new 3DS has more horsepower than the 'Cube. You can run and tell THAT, homeboy.

To be fair though, there have been rumors that the Gamecube had the internal capabilities for 3D way back in 2001, but the cost of the associated monitor was cost-prohibitive

The starting line-up of titles is pretty impressive: (*INHALES*) Kid Icarus, Mega Man, Metal Gear Solid, two Resident Evil titles, Super Street Fighter IV, Paper Mario, Mario Kart, Final Fantasy and 3D re-releases of the Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time Star, Fox 64 and (supposedly) Super Mario World.

But the fun doesn't stop there. 3DS will play DS titles (presumably) in 3D.

Chrono Trigger...in 3D. Oh god. It's full of stars!

That's it, right? You're sold. Well shut up for a sec. There's more. Nintendo will be offering a Virtual Console for previous Gameboy and Gameboy Color titles. Kirby's Dreamland, Metroid II, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, Link's Awakening. Now you have no reason not to.

There's also talk that the 3DS will have streaming TV coming to it as well, but only in Japan.